Looking back, I realise that I had difficulty in adjusting to the environment, the people, the places, the culture, yup, I was in culture shock. It can be really bad as I felt really alone and lonely... It's hard to describe but really I wanted to just run away... That's how I felt one Sunday when I was at Alvin's cousin's house for a baby shower... lovely food, the kids are fine, playing, there's lots of chatting and laughter...the ladies were nice, coming up to talk to me, and ask how I was doing, I responded and got some conversations going... but all I could think of was, 'When's the party going to end?' I felt sick and just missed my whole life where I had my family and friends... at that moment, I saw myself in 'ang-moh land'. That's culture shock?!
It seems that there are 3 phases in the term Culture Shock.
The 1st is known as the'Honeymoon Phase' in which one likes the new country and sees everything in a romantic light, wonderful and new. I have no recollection of this phase at all.
However, after some weeks or months, one starts to miss the food back home and starts finding faults with the new country, such as people's habits, etc. One gets annoyed easily and this is known as the 'Negotiation Phase'.
'Negotiation Phase". I personally experienced this to the fullest! There was this occasion with the hairdresser which we visited for Timothy's haircut. Such a simple errand, yet now, we had no clue which hairdresser to trust our son's crowning glory. And at the end of the day, it was a total disaster and I was annoyed to the brink of a volcanic eruption. I thought of storming into the saloon and give that lady a lecture and tell her to quit her job before she ruins another haircut. That day, I felt lost in 'angmoh land'!
Finally, if one gets accustomed to the new country and no longer reacts to the new culture, begins a more comfortable routine and is generally happy with the basic living condition. This is the 'Everything is OK' phase.
Culture shock...hating what's around me. It's a negative thought, very unhealthy, it was not good at all... but I guess it comes in a package moving to a new country.
These days, I'm no longer lost in 'angmoh land'. I've found my footing, orientated and well-adjusted... I've begun to appreciate my life here. I've learnt to manage my time while the kids are at school, saving some for myself. I realise how important it is to engage myself outside of the house. The involvement in the kids' classrooms and the school canteen takes my mind off the mundane chores at home.
What I appreciated most from this period of adjustment is the natural weight lost. I lost a few kilos now and am looking forward to a few more kilos. That'll keep me in better shape!
'Everything is OK' phase...that's more like it. I still feel irritated at times, like the day I couldn't figure out the aussie accent over the phone. I wish they just speak English lah! And at the same time, I feel as if I'm learning the language all over again.
I’ve received loads of encouragements from my loved ones in SGP. I’m very thankful. Thank God for the prayer support from my Christian friends. At times, I can be so blinded by homesickness. I need to know that there’s more in store for me than I can see.
So now, I’ll pack up all my homesickness in this post.
I’ll be sure to indulge in the company of my family and friends, the food and the familiar environment when I go back at end of the year. But for now, it’s forward looking and living for the present and the future.
CHEERS!
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